“Israel Hit by Worst Locust Plague Since 1950s”
Israeli agriculture officials sent crop dusters into the air to spray against the locusts that swept in from North Africa in the first such invasion since 1959.
Crop dusters? Israel can do better than that. Here’s my recommendation, based on Israel’s proud history of dealing with such pests. Assassinate their leaders with rocket attacks, detain their ambulances at check points for several hours (long enough for the patients to die), bulldoze their houses, steal their land, shoot them in the back, launch several unprovoked wars against them, strap their kids to your Hummers as human shields, construct a secret nuclear arsenal to keep surrounding nations who might sympathize with the locusts in check, surround the locusts with a segregation wall, effectively interning them in concentration camps, cut off their supply of water, fire unprovoked into crowds of protesting locusts, and have your PMs deny their existence in the first place.
And the sweetest thing is, you should be able to get a few billion dollars from the US to fund all of this.